In order to prevent a relapse back into my old ways and patterns, I must evaluate where my heart is. It’s so easy to ignore how I am feeling and have that old knee-jerk reaction to other’s words, looks, or actions.
I evaluate my heart motives by using a helpful acrostic borrowed from Celebrate Recovery:
H – Hurting
Is something else causing my heart to hurt and maybe I am deflecting that hurt onto others? Am I in physical pain that is causing my mood to be impacted negatively?
E – Exhausted
Am I so exhausted, I just want to be left alone and people are wearing on my nerves? Being tired can affect how I respond to others.
A – Angry
Is there some unresolved anger in my heart? How can I work towards a resolution?
R – Resentful
Am I holding onto some resentment of that person? What can I do to release the resentment?
T – Tense
Do I currently have tension that could be contributing to my reactions to people? What can I do to release the tension I feel?
Biblically speaking, Romans 12:3-17 outlines this for me as well.
On the surface, these seem relatively simple, am I right? While I am “in the moment” of a conversation with someone else, however, it is really hard to stop and think through the condition of my heart, at least at first. The more I practice this, though the easier it becomes.